Estelle

Todays post is in memory of my MIL Estelle who passed away 3 years ago today of ALS. Estelle was very special to me and close to my heart. When she started to get ill Rick, Aaron & I moved in to help take care of her and I would not have to work so I was able to stay home with our baby. Aaron was just under one. I never really had a clue what would happen through out that time. We went through a roller coaster of emotions the whole time. Estelle was always able to answer any kind of questions that I had in the past and eventually we had to spell out everything she was trying to say. She always stood up for me when Rick and I fussed. I could always count on her to back me up. :) Most of the time she was able to take her disability with some amusement. We would laugh at Richard when she pointed out that he "mouthed" every word she would say while he stood there and tried to understand her. At least she knew she had his attention. I remember pushing her across the room in a desk chair to help get her ready to go somewhere. I gave her a hard time about buying such thick carpet. She would tell me to quit complaining with a laugh and just push.
Estelle had a huge heart and she would always be there for anybody even though she was going through her own problems. One day comes into mind, I was beginning to lose my cool about life in general and she knew it (she would have known even if I wasn't so obvious) She called me over to her bed and I bent over her and spelled out what she was trying to say. I went through the alphabet and every letter that was right she would nod. She spelled out, "Are you ok?" Word for word, letter for letter. I looked at her with tears in my eyes and said, "yes". I was knocked back into reality when it hit me. I had a new appreciation and love for her. She was laying in a bed all day, not being able to move or speak and she was wondering if I was okay. I just want to give you a sense of what a warrior she was and how proud I am to be her daugher in law.
She would always laugh and sing until she couldn't anymore. Lookie lookie lookie here comes Cookie was one of her favorites. Her dogs name was cookie.
When Rick and I went through our tough times she was the only one who could convince me that it would all be okay.
She loved her grandkids. That was the only time I felt that I was number two and that was just fine with me. She prayed for all of us regularly. The prayers that she did for all of us then are still being answered and will continue to do so.
She love the touch and sounds of our babies. I miss her terribly and I really don't know if it has got any easier. My children will grow up knowing her and what a wonderful lady she was. I don't know why God needed her more than we did, but the selfish side of me wants her back. I don't understand why the good people have to go.